How Second-Hand Smoke Murdered My Best Friend

A Narrative Essay (Memior)




"So, what should we do today?" Michael asked me.
"I don't know," I replied. "We can't continue our adventure without Cheryl-Jean."
"I wonder why she isn't in school," Michael replied. "Oh well. We'll just have to play with someone else today. What about Pat or Chris?"
"Hmmm…. Pat," I decided. Cheryl-Jean would always be in school tomorrow. We would just have to wait until then to continue our "adventure"; that is, the never-ending games of pretend we would play, just the three of us usually, but sometimes joined by one or two others.
But there was a problem. She wasn't in school the next day, or the day after that. In fact, she was out of school for a month. It was about a week or two after the initial absence that my mom told me Cheryl-Jean had a disease called cancer. Of course, being nine years old, I had no clue what cancer was. I figured she meant the astrological sign. No, that wasn't it, my mom told me. Cancer was a very bad illness. Cheryl-Jean would require special treatments, and would no longer be attending school every day. She would be very weak, and not feeling to well, until she was better. She was not contagious, however, so she would be able to attend school whenever she felt well enough to.
I explained things to Michael.
"My mom told me that stuff, too," he replied.
"Oh? I hope she's not out for too long. We have to finish the game."
"She'll be better soon. No one can be sick for more than two weeks."
"Yeah. I'll be visiting her today."
"Cool. Tell her I said hi!"
As I said before, being nine years old, we had no idea about how terrible cancer really was. When I saw Cheryl-Jean that day, she looked completely different.
"She has no hair!" I told Michael the next day.
"No hair? What do you mean?" he asked.
"It all fell out!"
"No… that's crazy. Hair doesn't fall out."
"She said it did. She said the treatments for the cancer did it."
"Why would they do that?"
"I don't know. She said it needed to make her hair fall out to cure her."
"She's not better yet?"
"No… She looks horrible, too. She's very weak, and has trouble breathing."
"Why can't she breathe? Was she exercising?"
"No… she said the cancer was in her lungs."
"In her lungs?! Cancer can be in different places?"
"I guess so."
"Well, she better be better soon. It's almost summer!"
She did get a little better that summer. Just a little. She was able to have us visit her more often, and even could go outside. But the first few times I noticed something odd about her house. By the third time, I knew what it was; there was no smoke. Her parents had stopped smoking. That was why it seemed so different. Before, I could barely breathe with all the smoke. I would always want to play outside. That day, we were inside, playing her Nintendo 64. It wasn't until five years later that I realized why they had stopped smoking: second-hand smoke was the cause of Cheryl-Jean's cancer.
Even though she seemed to be improving over the summer, Cheryl-Jean still did not come to school in September. Occasionally, she would come to visit, but she never attended classes. The teachers would come to her house and home school her. She did visit as often as she could, though: always with a hat on, to hide her wispy hair. She had lost a lot of weight, too, giving her the appearance of a skeleton with skin.
Cheryl-Jean was liked by pretty much everyone she met. As my best friend, Michael, puts it: "She was like the ideal person that had no faults... Smart, funny, and she was friends with nearly everyone in our grade." And perfect she was. She got straight A's, just like me; she had achieved a black belt in Tai-Kwon-Do; and everyone, it seemed, was her friend. Sure, she mostly spent recess and classes with me and Michael, but she could literally walk up to any group and instantly fit in. She was great at everything she did: Sports, Videogames, English, Science, and though she struggled a tiny bit with Math, she still managed to get A's. Her personality seemed almost magical, as well. She was cheerful, though a bit quiet, and extremely bright.
Then, she was put in the hospital. I visited her a few times. It seemed like such a sad place; there were little sectioned-off areas, one for each bed. Down the hall, there was a playroom. There were a few children in there, but most of them were in their beds, watching TV or visiting with family. Cheryl-Jean was one of those kids, too weak to move. I gave her a Pokemon card that I had spent a few hours making myself: it wasn't very good, but it's the thought that counts. Her mom sent me a thank you card, for coming to visit. She said Cheryl-Jean loved the card.
A week later, as I was going to sleep, the phone rang. Odd. Not many people called that late at night. I shrugged and tried to sleep: it was most likely grandma calling about some show on TV.
After the call, my mom came upstairs. She sat on the edge of my bed, crying.
"What's wrong?" I asked. Mom had never cried before, or at least not that I knew of, anyway.
For a minute, she seemed at a loss for words. Then, she finally brought herself to say it. "Cheryl-Jean died," she choked.
I didn't reply. This was foreign to me.
"She died today, just a little while ago," she continued.
"Okay," I replied, not sure what to make of the situation. Mom was extremely upset, but I had no real concept of what dying meant.
I continued life as normal. It felt weird, like Cheryl-Jean hadn't really died. I kept thinking she would come visit the school again, just as she always had. But she never did. I never saw her again.
At the funeral, I watched as the coffin came down the aisle, as the priest said prayers. I noticed that almost everyone from my grade was there. But it was too quiet; no one made a sound, not even the little children. Church was never this quiet; there was always a baby crying, or people whispering. Mom said she had gone to the viewing beforehand, but she didn't want me to go. She had dad bring me to the church after the viewing, during the funeral.
After the ceremony, we went to the church's banquet hall, where refreshments were being served. People were going up to a stage and saying things about Cheryl-Jean. Her parents, and the rest of the adults, were all in tears; the other children and I were all just standing dumbfounded this whole thing unfathomable, so we started talking about video games and such. Michael wasn't there: he was on a trip to Florida. I wasn't nearly as sociable with people, so I just listened in on the kids' conversations. The adults just kept telling them to be quiet.
Cancer. It killed my best friend. No, scratch that: smoking killed her. Her parents were heavy smokers, and it led to Cheryl-Jean's death. Just as it nearly killed my grandma, who thankfully survived. Second hand smoke, both cases. Yet some people still smoke around others, without a care in the world. It makes me sick. Do they even realize that their smoke can affect the people around them? What about their children, friends, or relatives? Cancer is what can come of smoking: not just any cancer, but a specific type called Leukemia: cancer of the lungs.
If Cheryl-Jean's parents hadn't smoked, things would be different. Cheryl-Jean would still be here. Sometimes, I wonder what sort of person she would be, if she were in high school with me now. No doubt she would still be my friend: after all, she was the perfect match for Michael and me then, so why wouldn't she be now?
I miss Cheryl-Jean. She was like an angel. Maybe she was; maybe that's why she had to die. Maybe she was just too perfect to be part of the human world. But that's cruel, isn't it? No, something evil killed her. Something called second-hand smoke.

Shrineland (new blog)

Haha. Forgot about this.
My friend and I are writing a book.
We're not sure of the name,
but we're callign it Shrineland for now.
Yeah, it's a bad title, and it's probably not even
gonna be the final name of the country either.

Anyway....
I'll be posting a chapter every once in a while.
But I don't want the chapters to be confuddled
amongst all the other things I'll be posting,
So I made a new blog for it.
The link should be in the navigation under the blog archive.

So, please comment on the chapters!
We'd love to get as much feedback as possible.
Criticism is lovely, too!
The more you tell us what could be better,
the more we make better,
and then -BAM- it's a better story than ever before!
So please, check it out!

Brawl!

I am a huge fan of the Wii game Super Smash Brothers Brawl. Yeah! I just can't get enough of it. Through wi-fi, I Brawl all sorts of people. For those of you who have Brawl, I'd love to brawl you. For those who don't, GET IT NOW!

Most people have one main character. Well, I'm different: I have 2. Lucas and Peach. At first, it was just Lucas, but as I brawled more and more using Peach, I slowly improved with her enough to call her one of my 2 best charries. Other than those two, I also use Lucario, Jigglypuff, and occasionally Game&Watch or Pikachu. Yeah, I use all three Pokemon. I like Pokemon. Got a problem? No? Good.

Anyway, I'm on a few Brawl-related forums. There, I meet lots of very good competitive Brawlers. So I Brawl them. Yeah, I lose a lot, but practice makes perfect, right? I'm slowly getting better. So what if my best friend is tons better than me at Brawl? I beat him sometimes. Those other times, I just assess what I did and learn from my mistakes. That's the best thing to do to get better, after all.

I can brawl for hours. When my friends are over, brawling makes up half of our time together, at least. We just can't get enough! And when I have nothing else to do, I go on wi-fi and Brawl whoever's on. Some days I play for three or four hours, accumulated. (Never all at once. That makes my body feel weird.) When going to a friends house, an essential to bring is my controller, an SD card, and a readiness to do my best at Brawl.

Before SSB Brawl, it was SSB Melee. In some ways, it was better than Brawl, but in other ways, Brawl is way better. Maybe most people don't notice, but I do. When you're a serious gamer, you notice EVERYTHING. Brawl has a ton of new characters, but I do miss some of the older ones. I used Pichu sometimes in Melee, but he's not in Brawl. Pichu was considered pathetic by many people, because he had weak attacks, was extremely lightweight, and somewhat difficult to use. But when you're a serious gamer, you don't care. You find a way to use the character's strengths to your advantage. In Pichu's case, it's that his speed is matched by none. Some people put characters in Tier Lists. Pichu was at the bottom Tier. But I think Tier Lists are silly. Every character is good if you take the time to learn it's strengths and weaknesses, get good with the characters move set, and practice with it.

So, yeah. I'm a fanatic when it comes to Brawl, but in a good way. And, once again, if you don't have it, get it now! I want to brawl you!

Journal Time!

Well, we have to write our journals online today.
Hmm.... What should I write about?
Oh, I know!
How about.... How I plan to get rich!

Yes. I plan to get rich someday.
I'll live in a big house, with a nice view,
and I'll have plenty of room for all my stuff,
and plenty of money to buy new stuff!

You see, I plan to work in the video game industry.
I'll eventually, hopefully sooner than later,
become one of the top designers at a huge company,
such as Nintendo or Sony or Sega or something.
I'll make the most amazing characters,
storyboards, and stuff like that.
I'm not exactly sure what kind of designer I'll be.
I mean, there's so many!
A character designer would be cool.
Or perhaps I'd make backgrounds and stuff in the beginning.
Eventually, I will direct all the stuff that goes into the game.
But, you have to start out small first!
Perhaps I could be a storyboard director.
I do love to create intricate plots for stories.
But creating characters to fit stories is fun, too!
Especially fashion. Characters can wear so many awesome things!
Their clothing choices are unlimited-
Whatever you imagine, they can wear!
I would especially like to work on 3-D role-playing games.
Oooh, I can't wait!

Oh, but that's not the only way I'll become rich.
I will also write bestselling books,
and have a line of products for "Kate and Todd".
Plus being a famous chef wouldn't be bad, too.
And, of course, I'll be winning Archery competitions!

Yes... I am confident that someday, I WILL be rich.

Religion

Today, at gym, as we headed out to the tennis courts, some guys greeted us. They were from some christian organization, handing out Bibles. What the h? I mean, what about separation of Church and State? Last I knew, South was a public school. Okay, true, they were on the edge of school property. But quite frankly, I'm sick of it. School has a bible club now. What about other religions? I'm sure the Jewish people and Muslim people would want a club, too. They could probably have one. But what about other people, like Atheists or Wiccans? I'm sure if they tried to have clubs, they'd be turned down. Most people look down on them, and they shouldn't. It's just wrong. I'm not saying I agree or disagree with anything these religions believe in; I'm just pointing out that everyone should have a fair chance, and if that can't happen, then Religion shouldn't be in schools. I myself am agnostic; that is, I do not associate with a specific religion. So I consider myself impartial to this. Quite frankly, I believe religion is silly and unneeded; we're technologically advanced. Science can explain most of the things religion was created to explain, except for things such as god or creation of the universe. There are theories, but no proof yet on those. Anyway, it just sickens me to see people fall victims to it, believing everything their churches say. Religion is still a major player in politics, too. It makes me wonder: whatever happened to separation of church and state?

I hate the Church. It's an unnecessary organization. It's the age of science and technology. Things can be explained with logic, reason, and science. There is no need for such religions anymore; everything it was created to explain is now explained through science. Not to speak ill of any religion in particularly; it's pretty much every religion I speak of. Well, maybe not some smaller ones,such as Wicca and stuff, since they are not so much based on strict obedience to a god, who if you displease you go to hell. I'm fine with religions. I just don't like when they tell me I'm gonna go to hell if I don't believe in what they say! Sure, some things they teach make logical sense. But honestly, I don't think god is that mean, if there is one. I mean, I'm doing fine, and I don't pray. Quite frankly, prayer makes no sense to me. With billions of people, do you think god can listen to everyone? After millenia, do you think he or she cares about your petty problems? I should hope he or she is more worried about larger scale problems,such as the ending of wars and global warming. Anyway, I've rambled too long about this....

Rant... about love and stuff.

Well, in Creative Writing, Mrs. M talks a lot about love.
Yesterday, we were asked to make a comparison for the word "kiss."
I couldn't do it- I don't know what a kiss is like.
It brought me to the realization that I've never had a boyfriend.
It's a bit pathetic- after all, I'm already in 11th grade.
It's not that I don't want one.
But, honestly, no one likes me like that.
I don't think I'll ever have one, at least not in high school.
I've never even hugged or held hands with someone,
let alone kissed someone. (Kissing my cousin when I was 5 doesn't count!)
All around, I see people walking the halls as couples.
They hold hands, they hug, they whisper to each other.
Love.. it sounds so nice, to love someone,
especially when they love you back.
I wish I was loved by someone.
I wish someone could be there when I'm down,
to give me a hug and say "it's okay."
I wish there was someone in my life who would say "I love you."
I just want someone to care about me.
Someone I can hold hands with,
someone I'm not nervous around...
Someone that I can hug.
I can imagine it; it seems wonderful.
I wonder who the person will be, if I ever get a boyfriend.
You know, it really sucks, not having anyone love you.
It feels like there's a major part of life that you're missing out on.
Something that you can never have,
but that everyone else has.
I want that, too.
I want to be loved...

Announcement: New Blogs

I now have two new blogs!

The first is called "Larissa's Art."
There, i will post all of my newest art creations.
Please, don't be afraid to comment on them,
or even criticize, since that always helps me improve.
http://larissasart.blogspot.com

Also, I have a blog called "Kate and Todd."
They are two characters I have created.
I draw a lot of pictures with them,
so rather than putting them on my art page,
I have dedicated a whole separate blog on them.
Kate is an alien cat,and Todd is an angel bear!
http://aliencatangelbear.blogspot.com

Please check them out! ^__^