Hair

Hair. Let’s talk about hair. More specifically, haircuts. There are two things I have to say about them.

First of all, I want to talk about the Black Barber Shop, as I like to call it. It was in Ewing. The best haircut I ever received was there. It was a little more expensive than the places back home, but I needed a haircut. This was back when my hair was longer. The barber shop was the only one somewhat within walking distance from TCNJ (still half an hour though). When I entered it, well, quite frankly, my heart skipped a beat- literally. Everyone in the shop was black males. There were many patrons, too, so the wait was about an hour (apparently they were a really good place, and took their time and care with their cuts). I was very disconcerted, being the only white female there. Then, I came to a realization: is this how black people feel when they end up in a room full of white people, which often happens in many schools? I was shocked. Never before had I realized how they must feel; I had simply never even thought about it. They were really nice to me, too, which would rarely ever happen in the reverse situation, with one black and the rest white, which extremely surprised me, as well. I was very pleasant, though, so that may have helped, although I was obviously a bit weirded out by the experience, so they were sympathetic, too, it seemed. The haircutter even gave me a discount! So it was a bit of a strange experience, yes, but very insightful and rewarding in retrospect.

The second hair cut experience, or rather, experiences, since it happened more than once, related to me short hair. When I first got it cut so short, the barber did not want to do it. She said my hair was too pretty to cut it that short. I insisted, however, so she did it; but still not as short as I would have liked, and left it more “feminine;” that was not what I wanted at all, being genderqueer. I wanted a boy’s haircut, and I told her this. Yet the next barber did the same thing, when I went a month later to get it cut again (short hair grows much more noticeably than longer hair). She said, “You want it wispy in back, more feminine, like a pixie cut, correct.” It was a statement, not a question. I told her, “No. Shave the back; use the razor. I want a boys cut.” She reluctantly did it, but still left it to what she considered a bit more feminine than a boy’s cut and longer on top rather than all even, as I had asked. I ended up trimming it myself later, luckily managing not to mangle it too much. I am going for a haircut again soon, too, since it once again needs trimming… I hope this time they accept my desire to have a more boyish cut.

Activism- simpler than it seems.

Recently I finished reading a book called “Jumpstart the World” by Catherine Ryan Hyde. It deals with some issues in the GLBT community, with a focus on the Transgender aspect.

One of the characters, Frank, said “We all [as humans] pretty much agree on certain things. Equality and stuff like that. But whenever it turns up missing, people just let it slide.” This is true for all types of discrimination, whether towards race, gender, age, sexuality, or other things. If it doesn’t apply to them, people they know, or people in the same group, many people simply ignore discrimination, or don’t even notice it in the first place.

So activism shouldn’t be about fighting those who oppose you, rather about getting the world to notice there’s a problem in the first place that needs to be addressed rather than being ignored or unseen. Even as little as wearing a shirt or a button, or putting a bumper sticker on a car, can do wonders. Many people don’t help causes they believe in because they don’t think there’s anything they can do, but that couldn’t be more wrong; every tiny little thing helps, because it gets people to notice, which is the most important thing. Once people notice, they become aware that there is a problem and then steps can be taken to change that problem.

This is also connected to the “single-story” theory (which states that discrimination arises out of only hearing one story about a group, thus making that story part of the group’s definition); simply making people aware that there are multiple stories can be a great form of activism for any group, since then people discover that there is more to a group than just the “single-story” they have heard.

Don’t let inequality slide. Show them the gritty truth of discrimination, by doing whatever you can, even if it’s just a little bit, to make people aware of the full-picture.